Recipe: Lady Gaga Meat Dress – Lady Gaga Kebabs

by Brian Willett

Evidently, Lady Gaga chose the MTV VMA 2010 show to illustrate her new movement in fashion – that clothing should be tasty as well as stylish.  The Lady Gaga meat dress married fashion and function in a carnivorous sartorial delight.  Although PETA probably didn’t appreciate the Lady Gaga meat dress, Bloginity sure did.  And we were so inspired by Lady Gaga’s meat dress that we’ve prepared a special MTV VMA 2010 recipe: Lady Gaga Kebabs.

Lady Gaga Kebabs Recipe

At this point, we recommend turning things over to your professional chef, Alejandro – call him on your Telephone.  It’s not that we don’t think you can handle it, but you’re probably Starstruck and Speechless by being close to Lady Gaga and her meat dress.

In fact, after seeing how Beautiful, Dirty, Rich Lady Gaga is, I was So Happy I Could Die and couldn’t keep from smiling – my Teeth seeped right through my Poker Face.

But now – to the recipe – it is better than anything you’ll find under your Christmas Tree. Seriously, the flavor in this is Money Honey.


1lb Lady Gaga Meat Dress (1 lb of your favorite cut of beef also acceptable)

1 Lobster Tail (From Lady Gaga’s Diamond Lobster Mask if possible)

1 Teaspoon Salt

1 Teaspoon Pepper

1 Teaspoon Brown Sugar

1/4 Cup Olive Oil

1/4 Cup Diet Coke (Lady Gaga hair accessory cans preferred)

1 Large Yellow Onion, grated

1 Red Pepper

1 Green Pepper


Ignore the Boys, Boys, Boys talking about how hungry they are – tell them to go Dance In The Dark or play a LoveGame.  Rinse off your Meat Dress and lobster tail and cut them into one-inch cubes.  Combine the salt, pepper, brown sugar, olive oil, Diet Coke to make a marinade.

Soak the Meat Dress and lobster tail chunks in the marinade and place in the refrigerator for 24 hours – that’ll give you plenty of time to Just Dance or go talk with the Paparazzi.  Hopefully, you won’t have a Monster appetite while you wait.

Dice the red and green peppers, and place on skewers with the Meat Dress and lobster tail chunks. Don’t worry about being gentle when dicing – just imagine the pepper saying, “I Like It Rough,” and you’ll get the results you need.  Cook on the grill for 15 to 20 minutes, or in a 350 degree F oven for 20 to 30 minutes.

If you have leftovers, seek out your local Paper Gangsta and wrap them in wax paper.  You’re sure to enjoy these Gaga Kebabs more than your last Bad Romance, and you’ll likely experience some of The Fame when people ask about your recipe. At that point, just bat your Brown Eyes and tell them you got the Gaga Kebabs recipe from your Summerboy.  Oh, and tell them to download some of the Lady Gaga songs we mentioned right here.